Bedtime Blues

So I did it!

I moved out of B’s bedroom at the weekend and back into mine after 6 1/2 months of sleeping near his cot, for night time feeds and being able to see aswell as hear him. I guess that after 9 1/2 months this may seem a long time to be absent from the same bedroom as my partner’s, but I think it was the right thing to have done and I would probably do it all again.
B’s room is on a different level to our bedroom and being a big baby he was out of his moses basket by 12 weeks and I felt it was too soon to let him sleep by himself, so I also moved into his bedroom when he made the big step of sleeping in his cot. Plus having to get up a couple of times in the night to b’feed him was made easier by only having to drag myself from the bed to the cot to the nursing chair, rather than face a flight of stairs and a landing at stupid o’clock each night.
Plus as time has gone on it has been lovely having him come in to bed with me after his morning feed, allowing us to have a cuddle and doze together before we get up each morning. Aswell as the occasional time when he has woken up in the night, and rather than have to wait for him to cry himself to sleep he has got into bed with me where funnily enough he could go back to sleep a lot more easily!
But during the last fortnight B has suddenly started going through the night better and going down in his cot without the need to cry for 30-60 mins (until I gave in and took him out I hasten to add!), so I knew that it was time for me to vacate his room and return to my own. I realised that I needed to face the fact that my baby needs his OWN room without his Mummy being there aswell. I know there will be times when I will be sleeping on the floor next to his cot when he is ill, but, for now, it was time to leave him be.
That first night (Saturday) I could have cried when I lay in my own bed upstairs – sounds daft I know but it just felt a bit sad that the night time bonding we shared for all his life to date was coming to an end. He was fine of course! At 4am I heard him whimper slightly through the baby monitor and although he went back to sleep until 5.15am and then again until 6am, I did not – old habits die hard don’t they?
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Home Alone

So here I am writing my first blog.

It so happens that today is only the second time that I am without my 9 month baby boy. Since having him, he has only spent one day apart from me and today is his second.
I know he will be fine and is probably having a lovely tine with his Grandma and won’t give me a second thought, but it is strange not having him here at home with me.
On the walk home after dropping him off, all I saw were other mummies pushing their buggies and I felt kind of naked without mine! Popping into a well know high street retailer to buy lunch was much easier to get around without B in his buggy and was certainly quieter (he normally sounds like the crazy frog!) Plus I was able to take my time – something which I had forgotten about as normally I rush around grabbing thing for my basket to get through the check out and out as fast as possible in case B starts getting grumpy and cries for me to get a move on! Also I could walk through the store more easily without bashing into the merchandise or fellow customers! (buggies should display the ‘L’ sign to warn people to move out of my way I am coming through!).
So as I bring this first blog to a close, I note that I only have 4 more hours to go and then B and I will be reunited once more. An hour later after food has been flung on me, him and the floor; and when he winges when I leave him on the rug to pop into the kitchen; and when I am woken up tomorrow morning at stupid o’clock, maybe then I will wish I had enjoyed this home alone time more 🙂

I am linking this up with TheboyandMe ‘s Show Off Showcase link

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Thank you xx