Housework.
It’s probably one of the most under valued, under rated and thankless jobs there is. I mean, I don’t know about you in your house, but I never get any praise for it or even a thank you. It’s just expected of me to do it.
I don’t expect to be rewarded every time I dust and clean and vacuum; pick up things that don’t belong to me and put things back in their proper place; clean around the rim of a toilet that has been stained by someone else; pick up damp towels that have been draped over the bannister and pick up dirty washing that has not been left in the laundry pile, but all around the rooms of the house instead!
If a cleaner was employed he/she would get paid and would be thanked for their hard work wouldn’t they? So what is so different to those of us who are left to carry out the domestic duties in their homes? Why doesn’t housework get appreciated by our families?
If it wasn’t done, would comments get made by our spouses/live in partners? I think yes, they would. Yet, if the household chores were neglected would anyone else tackle them? Uhm I think not. I find that if I ever say aloud that the housework needs doing but I don’t feel like doing it, my OH tells me not to bother and leave it as the state of our home isn’t that bad. The thing is if I left it and didn’t attend to it at least weekly, it would just get out of control and take even longer to clear up when I did tackle it!
It’s not that I mind really looking after my home and cooking and cleaning afterall in my role as a SAHM it’s what I am in charge of aswell as looking after my children. Don’t get me wrong, I am grateful to my OH that I can stay at home and raise my boys and having housework as my job is fine by me. Afterall he works hard and long hours to raise enough money to allow me to be in the position of staying at home, so I don’t expect him to spend hours cleaning the house aswell. It’s not about me doing the household jobs, it’s about respecting the fact that I do and not taking it for granted so much.
It’s just that I wish dirty washing would be left in the correct place, to save me having to traipse around looking for it. Or maybe damp towels could be left on the heated rail in the bathroom. Empty cans could be put in the correct recycling box rather than the bin!!! You know little things that would make my life a little easier. It’s not like I wave a wand and it all the housework gets done. It does take a while and it usually happens after the children have gone to bed, when I am tired and would like nothing better than to sit down and relax.
I think that’s the difference isn’t it between being a Mum (and in some circumstances a Dad too if he is the one in charge of looking after the home) and being the one who goes out to work. Whereas their job is a set number of days and hours , to an extent, ours is 24-7: it is continuous and we don’t get time off unless our children are away and we have a rare few hours to ourselves. We can’t just switch off can we? Our working day doesn’t end . We can’t log in and out. We are on call all the time.
And as for you Mums who go out to work and keep a house going, I take my hat off to you because you must be knackered before your home-work starts.
Being a Mum and all that it encompasses is the best job in the world it really is, but I don’t think it’s gets the recognition by some that it deserves. Wouldn’t you agree?
Therefore, I think it is my duty as a Mummy to two boys to ensure that they are raised with an active role in helping out with housework chores and to learn some cooking skills. Then they will be prepared for living on their own and with a partner in years to come, and he able and willing to help out around their home. I want them to think of housework and cooking as a shared role and not solely the responsibility of one person and especially that of a woman.
That’s my mission and my challenge – wish me luck!
But will I manage it living in a home where I am outnumbered by the opposite sex? Only time will tell, I guess.
I am linking this up to a fab new feature called
Thank you xx
I can totally understand what you’re saying. I’d love it if OH could say the house looks nice or what I made was nice but he usually Is zoned out or staring at his phone so I prompt him by saying stuff like “is it not nice?”…it would be so great if he could acknowledge it!
I feel exactly the same way as you. I don’t mind doing it (that much) but it would be nice to get some praise or at least feel appreciated. When I am pre-menstrual I make a fuss about my OH doing a few things to make life easier which he says he will do but then he forgets after a couple of days and it makes it pointless me saying anything. Good luck! x
I really do feel the same, in fact I could have written this post 🙂 Some days I quite enjoy cleaning but generally I do it because I have to. It would be lovely to feel appreciated a bit more sometimes. Husband is quite good at doing things if I ask but generally its me. I think its important to bring all children up nowadays to be clean, tidy and independent so good luck with it all xx
It’s nice that your hubby will at least do some things if u ask him! it’s nice to know i am not alone!!mxx
I think everything feels far worse when we are hormonal!! Like you say, just the odd thank you would be nice wouldn’t it? thanks for commenting xx
Brilliant post. I am so with you. Had a big sob about the housework at the weekend. Everywhere was just such a mess. It hasn’t got much better. It’s just such a chore.
I think this is our duty for boys and girls. I am rubbish at housework and that’s because I never had to do any. Though of course I’m very grateful for that. I appreciate my mum more every day!
By the way would love you to link up to my bad day linky. I think this fits. It’s open all week.Â
http://1978rebecca.blogspot.com/2011/10/tuesday-tea-and-sympathy.html
Thanks for commenting. I know what you mean about it all bcmong too much sometimes – just makes me want to scream!! I helped my mum out quite a bit when I was younger. It’s still a chore and I hate it!!
I would love to link up, thank you xx
I’ve had enough of it now…I don’t think the weather helps, I feel much more like cleaning when the sun is shining. It’s a never ending task & there just doesn’t seem enough hours in the day to do it all. It doesn’t get any easier when they get older, they moan about helping & they make more mess – and why is it that everyone puts clean clothes in the wash just because they can’t be bothered to put them away!! grrrr
I have to give him a list and write it down though. He can usually manage 3 things! 🙂 xx
I am like you, my son will not be raised to be a lazy and inconsiderate male. I’m very lucky because generally hubby is good. I told him when he proposed “I will never do the washing up, I hate it with a passion!” and he agreed to that. I think in ten years of marriage that I’ve washed up (aside from The Boy’s baby stuff when I was on maternity) about 15 times? I also don’t do bins, that’s a man’s job. I of course load the dishwasher and empty it, but he does any residual dishes every night, and checks all the bins over. I do the cleaning, washing and ironing. My carpets are not necessarily as clean as they could be but with a part-time job and a child frightened of the hoover, I have little time to keep on top of it.
You’re right, keeping a house is a bloody difficult job and those that do it (men or women) deserve more credit.
Wow your hubby kept his word!! Lucky you. I didn’t realise the of was scared of the Hoover – that restricts you using it doesn’t it? I do the bins!! Thanks for commenting x
The only time I like cleaning is when OH has pi**ed me of and then I take out my frustration that way!! It doesn get any easier as they get older I am sure because the mess is greater and the excuses . Housework sucks really, I love it when I have cleaned but it soon gets wrecked again!! *sighs*
Thanks for commenting x
It is a man thing, they just do not see it.  I was and still am really stick with MadDad and the boys.  MadDad has a list of jobs that are his to do and the boys have to tidy too.
I think that having clear expectations of them helps. Â That way they can not forget, so even writing it down helps
I hear you , also why am I doing homework with my eldest, then reading with the middle one. Followed by laundry then making dinner. While my husband watched tv with the baby on his lap? Fair division of labour ? I think not.
I will also bring up my boys to do better.